Analog discs...

Subway, Styers Ferry Road

Suppertime

Salad with garlic dressing and turkey

The only customer

I sit in a booth

Facing the prep counter

Only one employee

We are together alone

In this small space

Cup of water and two cookies

White chocolate macadamia

Raspberry cheesecake

Through the speakers

Rock and contemporary music

99.5 FM 

One thing I like about local radio

The DJs are live

As they click the next play

Used to be

DJs would spin

Vinyl 45s, grooved discs

I wonder what time it is

I did not bring my cell phone

And I don't carry a watch

There is a clock on the wall

Analog, round with a face and three hands

But the hands' revolutions have stopped 

I walk over to eye a closer look

2:35 and 37 seconds

I wonder if it stopped at AM or PM

Descend and rise...

I am thankful for my husband and children and granddaughter, my few close friends, my trusted medical and wellness team, and Earth's wildlife and non-human creatures who have continually come to my aide through the decades...

~*~

I turn the knob of the tub faucet so water flows...

Water is a big part of the couple exit-life plans I've come up with...

Water will finish the deed so that no breath is left...

I turn the knob with feelings of utter worthlessness, shame, no value...

Of no light at the end of this dark, endless tunnel...

Feeling so alone and that I am only a burden to my family and beyond...

The pills, over 40 per day...

Just one unrelenting circumstance that I navigate...

But it won't take 40 for this deed...

I turn the knob of the tub faucet so water flows...

And a thought clearly emerges...

If Hawk is here, I'll not do it...

I turn off the knob and the flow ceases...

I walk to the bathroom window...

I peer into our big backyard...

There, regal and faithful...

Hawk, my companion...

I call Hubby...

~*~

The above happened on 12/11/2025...

Today is 12/16/2025...

I am still breathing...

~*~

Related post: Everydayness...

~*~

Not finished yet...

Cascades of color circulate...

How can a "cascade" circulate?

Cascades fall; they don't circle...

Or do they?

The curve of the rainbow...

The moon's multi-colored halo...

Both form as light reflects into the vapors...

Prism hues appear, then dissipate

Do vapors cascade?

Do vapors float?

Do vapors circulate?

Yes. Yes. Yes.

Energy flows through my physical body...

Cells, neurotransmitters, breath, blood...

Inside us each, cascades of color...

Listen. Sense. Feel.

~*~

"Do you feel complete?" she asks.

"Hmm, 'complete.' I wonder of its etymology," I respond.

"I don't know if I feel complete..." I continue.

As I think about it later, I realize...

Ah, I think "wholeness'" resonates more with me...

I do feel wholeness...

"Complete" beings to mind something that is "finished..."

And I'm not finished yet...

~*~