If Only

I thought I was through
the grief, the loss, the longing.
I guess it comes in stages
o'er and o'er again.

How many times must I cross this bridge?

I cannot seem to stop
this river's rise and swell.
A life its own, it spills over.
My soul once again overwhelmed
with sorrow, grief, tears of deep remorse.

I wish I had a dam
to somehow contain the swell.
But I don't
So I guess I'll let it spill.

march 10, 2007
~me

***

So much grief after leaving a "family" one's known for almost 3 decades.
So much grief even in reunions with past parted loved ones from the time in the family, reunions that occur after leaving the family, reunions that are joyful...yet bittersweet.
The grief needs to be honored; otherwise it might fester.
Festers are not healthy.
***