exhaust fumes

there are no words to describe the utter exhaustion

but here I go, trying to give it a try

it feels like my bones are going to collapse and that all my organs are going to fail

when i first experienced this, it was scary

now it's routine

it becomes difficult to put together sentences, other than with elementary language

socializing becomes exhausting, except with nature and animals

we socialize in a different way, on a different level

the simplest of tasks take all the concentration i can muster

sometimes I cannot muster

so i just sit, or lay

and ceiling stare

unless i'm outside, then i sky stare

and cloud watch

they move so effortlessly


[penned may 5, 2016,
1-1/2 weeks pre-epidural #12]

Salem Lake ~ clouds