flickers and fans

candle flame gently flickers

reflects itself in mirror

two flames dance

fan blades rhythmically spin

casting shadows

on the ceiling

flickers and fans

gently calling me

into dream

Deer significance...

The deer yesterday

She now runs free

I trust she remains safe

I still see her in my mind's eye

Panic in darkness

I understand panic in darkness

But she runs free now

I made a phone call

That helped save Deer's life

When Mom was at her darkest

She made a phone call

And I helped save her life

***

Below is a link to part of the deer story, with video: 

'Oh, Deer!' Winston-Salem man caught on camera rescuing deer in distress, stuck in bucket

I love how, when the deer runs free, all the humans rejoice!!

Maybe I'll post about the context of incidents sometime. 

A long time...

Why am I 

prethinking 

so much?

Because of years of living 

with my 

chronic condition

Its widespread symptoms

including side effects

of long-term steroids

Everything, all of it

inside, outside

north, south, east, west

The long history 

of it all

going back decades 

To my first 20-year 

chronic illness life

and to the current 10+-year

chronic illness life

Decades of a waking 

hellish nightmare, but also

of deep gratitude

and mountaintop experiences

So my week 

was another

week of struggle

Probably the most joyful moment

was watching two squirrels

on the back deck while I sat

on the screened-in back porch

They chased each other 

back and forth 

like they were putting on a show

for me

They would stop

and chatter

and start the chase again

Then they scampered 

up the Dr. Seuss tree

and continued their play

or romance or whatever it was

The whole show lasted

around 15 minutes

which is a long time