Whitewash

Prowling in veneer
Camouflage of empathy
Words of deceit
Laced with honesty
Dripping with sincerity
Twined with humor

Cloaking devices

Prey uncloaked
Vulnerable
Seeking
Desiring to trust

Trust won

Back stab
Daggering the prey

Prey dazed, confused

Six months pass
Prey empowered
Enough to speak her truth
Out loud

Predator pounces
Spewing lies
Without remorse
Pseudo-righteous cause
Character assassination

Prey shell-shocked, disbelief

Prey again speaks aloud
Predator's mask cracks
Unravels

Then the whitewash
Erasure
No accountability

Prey wounded, stifled
Soul violation
No roll call
Another non-person

Deja vu

Egesta

(Warning: language content)

I scoop poop
That's what I do
Day in, day out
Baggies with poo

Ridding the earth
Properly
Excrement
From four-legged
Beasts

To all the two-legged
Creatures
Who use others as
Commodities

I curse the air
You breathe

With velvet-cloaked dagger
You slice
Faux righteousness as
Your cause
Deed exacted, harm complete
You feign all is well
Moving on to your next
Endeavor
You whitewash
Dipping your brush in
Turpentine
You cleanse and sanitize

Curse every one of you
Whores and bastards

If a hell exists
May you be consumed
By a slow burn

Until then
May all your days
Be bathed by masturbation

I prefer the
Excrement
Bestowed by four-legged
Beasts

*******************
egest - to discharge, as from the body; void (opposed to ingest)
egesta - matter egested from the body, as excrement or other waste
*******************

Context?

Just a bit peeved at liars and thieves and manipulators.

I despise cover up, despise it with a passion.
It happens all the time, every day...in little things and large. All over this planet.

I hope to not grow cynical and to find gratitude for the good and to keep a tender heart in spite of the continual drippings of deceit that surround.

What prompted my anger was when I heard of yet another story of corporate downsizing (in a sleazy manner). It was the straw on the camel's back after the past year of an initially misdiagnosed ongoing drug-induced injury with no accountability on the pharmaceutical end; after mental health therapist abuse with no accountability and then the therapist publicly lying about it and me (and others) and then apparently running from the state and then what appears to be trying to erase the harms; after my car and bike get stolen from a garage and the waiting game not knowing if the garage will take any accountability; not to mention the residual leftover debris of previous years and decades.

One drip at a time to try to crust the heart.

It's the no accountability, the hush factor, that pisses me off. Gawd it can make my blood boil.

Now onto laughter and good stuff...I hope.
_________________

fumes

my stomach turns as i gaze
upon your feeding ground
innocent hearts sipping your syrup
until your poison nectar drowns

will they too discover your twisted ways
like needled barbs upon the stem
will they suffer harm as they imbibe
like a dose of coke that then goes dim

why do i even bother to care
i wish i'd never engaged your offers
i pray my heart will not implode
privately hissing a toxic scoffer


05/03/11
~me

*******************
context may come later

vapor pressure

My stomach gnarls as i read
smooth words drip
one letter at a time
from finger tips
tapping 'cross your key board

You write of wounds
your own and others
yet what of those
you've inflicted
amidst your so-called
justified tone

A hypocrite of hypocrites
one who offers healing
while exacting harms
without remorse
dismissing the inflictions
as inconsequential

Such can cause my blood to boil
perhaps burning away the chaff
of my own self-hatred
to which you at one time
offered solace

Your genius calls
and you are heeding
i'm sure some will profit
i pray it be not at the expense
of another wounded soul


judithpiper
12/16/10

***

When I read certain essays or articles or sharings from people who offer help and healing among those who are in process of recovery and rediscovery after cultic involvement... When I read certain pieces penned by authors with whom I've had personal and intimate experience of their own hypocrisy exacted toward myself and/or others that I know... When I read such, I sometimes find myself feeling rage, leaning toward a feeling of hatred, of their words, and even of them. Their words to me lack authenticity, even though the words may sound compassionate, smoothly laced with honey.

No doubt, the authors have helped some people...maybe many...and perhaps even me. But then The Way helped me too. Other organizations, by whom people have been harmed, have helped other people...and initially maybe helped even those who ended up harmed.

As I've stated elsewhere: In any so-called service/support organization, if people are expendable, therein the org is fraudulent.

We all harm others at some point. It is the denial, the dismissing of those harms, that makes the hypocrite.

At times, I imagine most all humans find themselves as the hypocrite. Hopefully we own up and thus become more Hippocratic than hypocritic.

The catharsis of the keyboard. It doth help me when anger tries to squeeze its grip upon my heart toward vengeance.

Reasons

*****

silence
of nonexistence
deafens

I despise it with a passion

hush
of hypocrisy
murders

I pray I never bow again

If left unchecked they breed a rage
unjustified
to the blind audience

rage
unchecked leads to
violence

And the dazed, nescient crowd wonders
"How?"
"Why?"

silence
there's more than meets
the ear


judithpiper
july 3, 2007

****

The book "The Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse" has a photo on the front cover - a man and a woman both with their index fingers over their lips... "shhhhh." The photo doesn't show their eyes.

That's how (or one way) any abuse can continue...the hush rule. "Don't tell." It's a "private" matter. Secrets.

Yet underneath all that silencing is an abuser in control.

It happens in social groups on a continuum...at the office, in families, in social clubs, in churches, in internet chat rooms and online forums. In The Way it was known as the "lock box."

When someone escapes that power, the mindset can (will?) continue until the abused directly addresses the mindset and restructures thinking patterns. It's not an easy task; it's hard damn work.

The person may (most likely will) go through a phase of bitterness and rage. If that phase isn't addressed properly; the rage can erupt like a volcano into violent reactions, words, and deeds. It may quiet, but still boils underneath. Unless it is dealt with properly, the violence may escalate when the right catalyst comes along.

*********